California LOVE

 When I left Doris Jean to move to California with Sean it was literally one of the hardest decisions I have ever had to make.  I knew it was the last time I would see her and that was torture all in itself.  As I said before, we were dirt poor when Sean and I first moved to California, like no condiments, sleeping on the floor poor.  When we finally got to our final destination on Treasure Island, things started to turn around.  I got a job at the Base Child Development Center.  I loved working with kids and when I lived in Delaware through High School and a bit afterward I worked for the local hospital's daycare.  

Where this CDC was located was between Oakland and San Francisco.  A lot of the employees would come from the Oakland side to work there.  California is where I learned about what the "hood" truly means. It is definitely not like these little areas around Delaware that you get warned about. 

I don't know how to say this politically correct so I am just going to say it.  I love black people.  I love all people but black people have been there and shown me love and kindness throughout my life like no other race has offered me.  Doris Jean loved all people and she showed it. Anytime anyone including my dad would use the "n" word around me she would say in a harsh tone, don't you ever say that word. That is a hateful word. You call all people by their names.  God created us equal.  We are to love everyone. She was AMAZING! I can't say that enough. 

I remember I was about 6 or 7 and I was with a Youth Group selling Christmas wreaths door to door in a pretty nice neighborhood.  I had to pee so bad, I was in tears.  The adult I was with would ask the person who opened the door if I could use their bathroom.  After about three no's, I had already pretty much peed myself but a sweet older black lady opens the door and said she sure can, honey go ahead and use the bathroom and pointed me to it.  I was so so thankful to her. 

 I had friends in school of all races and socio-economic backgrounds. I was never uncomfortable and I fit in where I got in.  Also, remember that Rap & R&B were on fire when I was a teenager and I was there for it!  You can't tell me nothing about the music in the 90s!  My friends will tell you!  

So the reason I bring this up is that I wanted to and that the daycare that I worked for on Treasure Island had maybe 3 white people and 40 black women.  Most of the ladies embraced me with open arms.  You had the older ladies who were very motherly and looked out for me, a few military wives who knew the military life and all that comes with it and there were a few younger nasty ladies in the mix that went out of their way to be rude to me.  You know how I always say Be BOLD?  I was young and bold back then when maybe I shouldn't have been.  My mouth would sometimes get me in trouble as I would stand up for myself.  You see, I worked there during the O. J. Simpson trial. Every day during breaks the T.V. would be on with the trial. I should have kept my opinions to myself but I didn't.  I was like he is guilty, he either did it or had someone do it. That caused some issues for some of the ladies who believed he was innocent. Thank God for growth and for teaching me that not everything I think needs to come exploding out of my mouth.  

  Overall, I made some amazing friends at that job.  We have lost touch through the years but they were simply everything to me back then.  When Doris Jean died I said in a previous blog that there were women standing all around me while I sobbed and lost the ability to think or breathe. They were all black women. Hugging me, whispering to me, praying for me, and crying with me.  They took care of me and helped me get through the toughest loss I had ever experienced.  I think of them often and was blessed to have each one of them in my life.  

I would often babysit some of my friend's children as they went to the Daycare and they knew me well.  Two things I learned quick.  You can not put baby oil in a little black girl's hair.  I was trying to be helpful and decided I would do her hair. After I slathered all of that oil in her hair, it was so oily that the hair ties and barrettes would just slide on out. I really thought I was doing something! The other thing is, a t-shirt is an undershirt, not to be worn without a shirt overtop of it. I learned that one quick.

I am going to be sharing a lot of stories through this blog, some good, some bad but always honest. I realize that both black and white people may not have lived the way I have and may not have had the exposure and the love and support I have had through the years. There is fear in the unknown but I promise you there is beauty in relationships/friendships no matter the color of someone's skin.  Please do not make your judgments about a race based on what you see on T.V.  I will be talking about race relations and my experiences throughout my life as I believe you may gain a fresh perspective hearing about my relationships and crazy stories!  Be BOLD friends! I encourage you to reach out and make connections with people outside of your race if you haven't done so already.  It truly has been a blessing in my life and I wouldn't trade my friends for the world.