Check Your Tone

 My plan was to get back to sharing my Maryland days but like I have said before, life happens.  I am big on energy, body language, and yes, the tone in one's voice.  I have a visceral reaction when someone's tone is snarky or disrespectful.  It is so unnecessary!  Sometimes I let it go, sometimes I do not. 

I was super busy all day working Saturday for an event I coordinated for the school district I work for.  Great day, tons of people, and the kids were happy - mission accomplished.  Waking up Sunday morning I was still tired from the day before and looked forward to lounging around the house. My husband Sean asks if I want to drive the golf cart while he plays nine holes of golf. It was chilly outside, a little windy but I felt like I hadn't seen much of him because of his work hours and I worked Saturday.  The "good" wife in me says sure, I'll go.  I mean I am literally sitting there driving around a golf course, I can do that. We played the last nine so at about hole 15, I was cold and ready to go. As Sean was golfing, I would watch a group of four guys golf as well. There was one man in particular that I noticed was very angry.  He would throw his club in his golf bag, and slam himself into the golf cart to where it would shift hard from left to right.  I am sure there was some cursing but I was too far away to hear them.  I mentioned to Sean how pissed the one guy was and we kept going. We were at the last hole and the foursome was finishing up.  Again, I could see by the angry guy's body language he didn't have a good day on the course.  I drive Sean up to the green and the angry guy yells in the most disrespectful tone - Are you going to let her drive that close to the green?  Sean turns around and says, are you talking to me?  He says yes, I am talking to you. You should know better, that is disrespectful.  She shouldn't be that close.  Sean says she's only done this a few times, meaning driving on the course.  He said how about you, is this your first time?  You know better.  This is where I start getting aggravated and channeling Jesus! Grrrr.... Sean asks the man, have you been drinking?  He chuckles and says nope, not a drop.  He continues to say something and I say to Sean, just ignore him.  Now mind you my cart and back is facing him.  He yells to me, ma'am nothing against you, this was a teachable moment.  I turned around and said yes, thank you, sir, I learned a lot.  

My positioning on the course at that time was questionable, I agree, but there is a way in which you speak to people. The only thing he taught me was who I don't ever want to be.  I feel like we are at a place in society where people think they can speak to you any way they see fit.  That doesn't fly with me one bit.  I am all about getting your point across but do it in a respectful manner.  We have to stand firm out in the world friends.  Don't make it ok for people to speak to you in any kind of way.  You deserve respect just like anyone else does.  If people have commented on your tone, check it and change the way you communicate.  You will not be heard if you constantly present a tone to people when you are speaking to them.  Be BOLD!!